HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!!! its been a very bad year last year..hope this year will be better than 2moro.....
bare with me...this is going to be a long long post....believe it or not....its long cause it took me a while to figure out wut to blog about, then its a long post as well....
about 2 post back..i ended my post by saying, i needed a time out....
to be specific....it was about my life and my work as well, theres far too much disappointment and heartache invlove...
lets jus start with my work...
its been 2 years tat i have been with S.E.S, more or less, my existance in the company helped...but in a way, i worked too much till i gave up, it maybe somewhere in the middle tat the company have management and rules change tat made me working nonstop...all this while i dun mind working hard...but up till a point where i'm working till it affected my own life and making me feel tired, tats where it gets me.....
the problem is with this company is their own ppl, my colleague, yes....although they all are all so wonderfull person, but when it comes to smth tat will get scold from boss or have to take responsible of...everyone backs down and i'm the only one who gets it....my idea of working in an event is, everone involve, it don't matter who do wat and wat needs to be done....its automatic...jus like how it used to be last time when i was freelancing....but now....when it comes to heights, my name always pops up, and since lighting means climbing more, means everytime when theres a prob, i'm the one tat always been told......i love heights, but wut about other ppl then? i did too much till i myself very tired......
it wasn't suppose to be like this...wut breaks me is when i was doing GrassHopper's Concert, and one of the freelancer is the one who is same generation with me of freelancer....i remember how we used to work and dun mind how hard it is....even more harder than wut i'm doing now and we stil laugh about it....but it turns out everything change so much since i left freelancing till the ones i work with also changed....one concert like this....can make him complain tat the work is so hard...i remember i kept on hearing hearing their complains till on the 4th day of the day....i pulled my fren out and started scolding him.....it was so heartache till my tears starts to come out.....the only thing is i can't believe wut is happening rite now....one thing i have passion of and believing tat things will be the same is all wrong...i scold him till a point where i'm lazy to work anymore....more or less tat really broke my spirit....
i'm gonna find a way for myself not to be this way..... i'm changing the whole thing like how i used to do when i 1st started...this i swear.....i'm gonna change the whole thing again...i might even leave the company if this still continue, there is so many demand for me and shows to do overseas, but because there is some complications...lets jus stay a while and i'll see how.....
some GrassHopper's Concert Pic.........really some.......
a view from the side stage...tats wut bothers me recently...theres a lot of upcoming concerts to do after this CNY...will be very very bz again....
now lets talk about my life....
work has pretty much occupied my whole time, but still somewhere in the middle, i try to balance it out between it....
love life...has been pretty much interesting ride for me......somwhere between there and now, theres few more wrong try....i dunno whether its me...or its the girls prob, i kept on getting dumped....after Lilian, i gave few a try but still din work out....up till one day i was talking to someone whom i added sometime ago but never got the chance to chat with each other...
Her name was Jessie Yap, my first impression of her was more or less neutral, but wut makes her stands out is her personalities and how much it never gets bored, even if it means tat i pijak her all the time....most importantly, she listens...even as a fren then, she's a very understding and caring person as well....like i always like to say, every girl is different, she is one person i never known to exist....all the thing i imagine for me to be happy.... it struck me right in the middle and tat wut made me go for her.....
it took me sometime to figure out wut and how as she is one person who likes ppl to guess, giving these hint and such....till one day we were watching Saw at my home...i asked her a simple question then it turn out to be yes already, i din get the hint after few secs....
wut we have in common was wut she wanted in a relationship and its exactly the same as me....simple stuffs and her love life was pretty much didn't get appreciated by the guys tat have been with her....i tend to change tat.....tats wut makes me from like to heart to love.....i never thought it struck me back, but yes...i do love her.....i can see she does as well cause she wanted to know more and more about me each day, reading all my blog post and it made her understd a bit more each and every day.....i finished reading her blog yesterday and i understd a bit as well......
for all those lesson i learn, i learn very well not to let go of something i'm sure off, i wan her to feel tat i'm different than the other guys he knows and the ones tat has been with her....this i'm very sure....its been 2 weeks plus we've been 2gether and it felt like its long time already.....yes...i'm very happy as well....
♥
Baby u never notice....but how fragile u are...i am as fragile as well....lets jus not break each other shall we? i love u.....
this is how we are and this is how it should be in my dream......
more updates very soon....
now lets talk about my life....
work has pretty much occupied my whole time, but still somewhere in the middle, i try to balance it out between it....
love life...has been pretty much interesting ride for me......somwhere between there and now, theres few more wrong try....i dunno whether its me...or its the girls prob, i kept on getting dumped....after Lilian, i gave few a try but still din work out....up till one day i was talking to someone whom i added sometime ago but never got the chance to chat with each other...
Her name was Jessie Yap, my first impression of her was more or less neutral, but wut makes her stands out is her personalities and how much it never gets bored, even if it means tat i pijak her all the time....most importantly, she listens...even as a fren then, she's a very understding and caring person as well....like i always like to say, every girl is different, she is one person i never known to exist....all the thing i imagine for me to be happy.... it struck me right in the middle and tat wut made me go for her.....
it took me sometime to figure out wut and how as she is one person who likes ppl to guess, giving these hint and such....till one day we were watching Saw at my home...i asked her a simple question then it turn out to be yes already, i din get the hint after few secs....
wut we have in common was wut she wanted in a relationship and its exactly the same as me....simple stuffs and her love life was pretty much didn't get appreciated by the guys tat have been with her....i tend to change tat.....tats wut makes me from like to heart to love.....i never thought it struck me back, but yes...i do love her.....i can see she does as well cause she wanted to know more and more about me each day, reading all my blog post and it made her understd a bit more each and every day.....i finished reading her blog yesterday and i understd a bit as well......
for all those lesson i learn, i learn very well not to let go of something i'm sure off, i wan her to feel tat i'm different than the other guys he knows and the ones tat has been with her....this i'm very sure....its been 2 weeks plus we've been 2gether and it felt like its long time already.....yes...i'm very happy as well....
♥ Baby u never notice....but how fragile u are...i am as fragile as well....lets jus not break each other shall we? i love u.....
this is how we are and this is how it should be in my dream......
more updates very soon....
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